I acted like a child

God came to me tonight and talked to me. I had been asking many people for direction and they gave me very wise yet unsatisfying answers. They helped me to me to see a holistic view of my situation, and for that I will be forever indebted, but they did not give me a way to cope in this new world that I have immersed myself in. They gave me promises of a support system and they gave me promises for better days but they did not give me a way to tackle my obstacles full on. I have asked the same question over and over again to many bright people. I have asked, how do I deal with people who stand as obstacles against me? I have asked, how do I respectfully and politely handle them while ensuring that I get what I want in return?

I don't know how but I forgot to ask God what to do. And then I remembered. I was directed to Corinthians 12-14. I had read it before. Only this time, I had a limited understanding of the gifts that God had given me so I immediately understood how foolish I had been in handling these gifts. See, God gave me a gift. God gave me a compassionate and forgiving heart. God put it in me to think the oppressed and those who oppress, I know of mercy because God gave it to me. Who am I to deny it from someone else? I should not forget that God compelled me to think on this.

I can't count on one hand where I have attempted to figure out why my human obstacles became obstacles in the first place. I have not even thought about why they feel the need to roadblock me and so many others. It hasn't even occurred to me to contemplate what pain they must be in to put others through such pain. What makes them cling to their traditions? What makes them hold on to their unsympathetic world? How does it feel for them to chase unattainable ideals?

I cannot keep a record of wrongs. Lord knows that God have forgiven me. I must love and I must forgive as God forgives me. I must remember that they also hurt in oppressing other people. As an advocate of God, I must remember how everyone is a victim to godlessness. I must not reason like a child and say well they hurt me so I will shut my heart against them. I must listen and put God first and love.

To say this does not believe that they aren't blame worthy. I know I am blame worthy. We all have to be accountable for that. The point is simply that my human obstacles are people too. My human obstacles are God's children. They are the love of God's life. I have to take this into account when I try to determine how to interact with them.

But also, the work that other people are doing is important,. It is also God’s work. I don't know why I get it into my head that my work is somehow more meaningful and important. .I should support and encourage their work, I should help those that advocate with God..

I am so thankful that I have a God that loves and corrects me.